If you are close to retirement or planning an event for someone close to retirement then odds are you are looking for a speech of some kind. Retirement speeches are available to you from various sources at a price. Unless you are willing to pay for a speech writer or “joinâ€ an online speech writing site you probably will not find a complete speech that is useable. What you can find are ideas, samples and partial speeches which, all combined and personalized, will get you that speech. I have heard many retirement speeches in my time and the best were always sprinkled with humor. That is true no matter who makes the speech so one place to find retirement jokes is, you guessed it, RetirementJoke.com. Here are more places to help you get started:
Speeches.com has a site where you can construct a canned speech, whether you are the retiree, a colleague, a boss or a family member. Normally you will have to be a member (which costs money) but they have a free trial. That allows you to get an example for the first part of your speech. To finish the speech you have to join but maybe the first part will get you going.
Presentation Helper has a couple of examples, one for a speech to a retiring executive and another is the response to that speech by the retiring executive.
Over at Public Speaking Advice are a free retirement speech sample and some good advice.
NewRetirement has a list of funny quotes that can be used no matter who is giving the speech. Fun to read even if you don’t have a speech to write.
I hope these resources help. Finally, one of my favorite one-liners: “Old teachers never die, they just grade away”